Hi yo Silver – AWAY with The Lone Ranger!

LR

Yes, Johnny Depp makes a great ‘Tonto’.

Yes, Armie Hammer (though not quite a ‘dish’) shines as John Reid aka the Lawyer aka The Lone Ranger.

But the star of the show in our opinion – Silver.

The white Horse, in which Tonto called a “spirit horse” (but could also be misguided and ‘confused’ as it chose the ‘kemosabe’ – the wrong brother), is just hysterical.

From drinking beer straight from the bottle, having the knack to show up at odd places where horses simply can’t – err…like on top of a roof, or on tree branches – Silver, who finally has a name at the end of the movie, is the most appealing character in the film.

Not that the rest of the cast wasn’t good – no no no…It’s just that, it’s a bit too boring and stereotyped – we have the damsel in distress, the baddie (like super bad as he rips out hearts and lungs and eats them raw!), the joker (obviously Tonto), the ‘I-am-the-law’ hero (who is probably the lamest hero ever)…we think we better stop before we hurt ourselves.

Watching Tonto goofing around in The Lone Ranger was like watching Jack Sparrow goofing around in Pirates of the Carribean. Outcast by his tribe, the cuckoo Native American Indian was left emotionally-scarred when his entire tribe was wiped out due to his own mistakes and greed (over a lousy watch). Though wasn’t that fond of John at first, he ‘recruited’ him to seek justice, by becoming the ‘outlaw’.

Their ‘bromance’, odd-couple relationship was hilarious – to an extent that they became a bit too…err..draggy – like the rest of the plot.

It’s a bit of a shame, that the quirky and eccentric Helene Bonham Carter’s Red Harrington only gets a tiny role in the blockbuster. Her ‘ivory’ peg-leg is really something you shouldn’t be messing around with – and as they are often featured together, the chemistry between her and Depp is indeed remarkable.

Lets see…Armie Hammer as John Reid, the ‘educated’ lawyer who doesn’t believe in using guns – yes, believable.
But Armie Hammer as The Lone Ranger – the masked vigilante seeking the ones responsible for his brother’s death, the outlaw who’s supposed to uphold the law – err..perhaps somebody else could fit in the shoes. Somebody who doesn’t get bullied as much, somebody who stands up for himself.

For someone who’s ‘educated’ he is surely a bit of a dimwit, who doesn’t realise he’s being duped the whole time.

Which is why, again, Silver remains our favourite character.

We don’t wish to give away too much of the plot – but rest assured, there are plenty of guns, slaps, action, explosions – just what you expect from a ‘cowboy’ movie. The part that got us most excited was..you guess it – upon hearing the familiar theme of The Lone Ranger. We felt like enrolling ourselves in horse-riding classes straightaway!

“Hi yo Silver, AWAY!”

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